This will help you determine your marriage strengths and areas for improvement. I would encourage you to have your spouse take it, too. It can help you identify those blind spots that need work.
Score you and your marriage (and print out) from 1 to 5 with 1 being Poor, not effective, not satisfied; 2 being Rare, but occasional effectiveness and satisfaction; 3 being Average, spotty but somewhat effective, satisfied; 4 being Good, do pretty well, fairly satisfied, strength; and 5 being the Best, doing well, very satisfied, a real strength area.
Area of Focus
Score
We make decisions together and are in unity.
Communication is a priority and we communicate well.
My spouse trusts me, and I trust my spouse.
We have a good sexual relationship.
We show affection and make time for romance.
We have daily personal interaction and involvement.
We manage money effectively and together.
We are involved together at a church.
We have positive spiritual interaction at home.
We support each other’s careers/callings.
We support each other during bad times and struggles.
We interact with friends together more than apart.
We spend quality free time together.
We have learned to resolve conflict together.
We have learned to adjust to each other’s differences.
We have positive interactions with our relatives.
I listen attentively when my spouse is talking.
I do not interrupt my spouse.
I express appreciation for my spouse.
I can disagree without losing my temper.
I serve my spouse above my own needs.
I encourage and validate my spouse.
I give my spouse quality time daily.
We have a daily undivided attention communication time.
We read the Bible together daily.
We pray together daily.
Family time is a priority for both of us.
We have an honest and open relationship.
We have 5 times more positive moments than negative.
How much time do you spend together alone as a couple?
Describe three things your spouse does that you appreciate.
What are three personal qualities of your spouse that you appreciate?
How often do you recognize or appreciate these things or personal qualities?
What do you do to show that you love your spouse?
Read Proverbs 17:14,28 and
Proverbs 29:11—Are you listening?
Are you controlling your tongue?
Many tools to help you are available in A Lasting Legacy.
